Dear Neighbor

Remember how I was literally just bragging about my new morning workout routine?

The one that has me dragging my ass out of bed bright and early every single morning to get on the treadmill? The one I have stuck to now every single day for almost 4 weeks? The routine that has me feeling like a lean and mean fighting machine once more?

Um, yeah… so it turns out that everyone is not as excited about my newfound commitment to cardio as I am.

Wednesday night, the same night I was doing all that bragging here; I came home to a note on my door.

Taped there with packing tape in a rather ominous fashion.

“Great” I thought to myself. This would either turn out to be something really cool (cute neighbor boy finally going out of his way to introduce himself?) or really uncomfortable (creepy stalker turning up to terrorize me.)

My arms were full and it took me a few minutes to get into the house and settled before I could turn my attention to this note. I was driven both by curiosity, and a gut feeling telling me I should just toss it and pretend I never saw it at all.

When I finally opened the note, this is what it said:

Dear neighbor,

I’m sorry if I’m sounding like a pain, but if there is any way you could move your treadmill it would be greatly appreciated. I hear it start up around 6:30 most mornings. I certainly understand wanting to get that workout in before you start your day as I am a runner myself. Could you push it against the wall that is not connected to the other side of the building? Perhaps in another room? What about the garage? I don’t mean to sound like on of “those” neighbors, it’s just that I’m a light sleeper and I hear it when it starts. I tried sleeping on my couch in the living room so I don’t hear it… but now my back and neck are kinked from sleeping on the couch. :( If you could help your fellow neighbor out that would be awesome!

I sat there for a moment perplexed. I had no idea who these people were. I knew the note had to have come from the people I shared a master bedroom wall with, but I had never actually seen them before. In 3 years of living here, we had never come face to face. There were different entrances and stairways up to our units, so there simply weren’t a lot of instances when we would have met. And since they didn’t sign a name or give me any way to contact them – I was lost as to whether this was even a guy or a girl I was dealing with.

I never would have gotten a treadmill in a million years if I had a downstairs neighbor, but… I don’t. My unit is located directly above the garage. Our condos are basically set up with four units per floor. There are two main walls that are connected to other units (along the master bedroom, and the spare bedroom) and then two main walls that aren’t connected to anything (along the living room and kitchen). I can honestly say that in the 3 years I have lived here, while I have heard my upstairs neighbors many times, and noise from the garage almost every day, I’ve never heard anything from either of those shared walls. Not Televisions or radios or anything. They are pretty sturdy walls.

It had never occurred to me that they would be able to hear and be bothered by my workouts. And realizing that they had been, made me feel awful.

But in that same breath… I didn’t want to be giving up this new habit that was contributing so much to my overall well-being.

I didn’t know what to do. There truly was no other place in the unit to move the treadmill to. These are VERY small units – only 780 square feet – and with a roommate here as well, the common areas are tight already. Besides, the treadmill was a good 5 feet away from the shared wall with a dresser in between as it was.

I couldn’t figure out how they could hear anything at all. Especially when my alarm clock is right up against that wall and goes off every morning for up to half an hour (we’ve covered the fact that I’m not a morning person before, right?) at a pretty loud volume. If anything would be waking them up, you would think it would be that.

The only thing I could come up with was that it wasn’t the noise they were hearing, but more likely vibrations from the actual pounding of feet to the treadmill through the shared floor.

Still… what was I supposed to do? Their suggestion to move it to the garage wasn’t even kind of viable, and was actual borderline ridiculous. It’s a garage that is shared between 8 units. There is absolutely no place that a treadmill could go, short of my parking outside and putting it right there in my space. Which I’m fairly sure would be just about the most awkward place ever to work out. Not to mention, wouldn’t that make the treadmill more or less a free for all?

Like I said, not a viable option.

So, I called my dad. Pretty much the most moral person I know. I wanted to do the right thing, but… I didn’t want to lose the right to workout in my own home in the process.

His immediate suggestion was that I needed to go over there and talk to them face to face. Making sure I apologized first and foremost for any inconvenience they’ve experienced since my morning workouts began. But then working towards compromise if at all possible.

Because the problem with this situation is – there really are valid arguments for both sides. I should be able to work out in my own home. We live in a condo setting, and this is just one of those things you have to deal with when you are piled up on top of each other like that; you will occasionally hear your neighbor’s noises. One of the first things I did when I moved in was buy myself a white noise machine, because I knew if I didn’t that I would be waking up all night every night from both my upstairs neighbors moving around, and the garage beneath me being accessed. My upstairs neighbors actually have a habit of vacuuming at 7 am. On weekends. But you know what - they're totally justified in doing that in their own home. I realized it was my responsibility to do what I could to adjust to those noises. Never once did it ever occur to me to complain about any noises I heard (and trust me – I hear a lot!) As long as someone is using their space in a reasonable manner, I don't feel like I have a right to complain about that. This was what I signed up for. There are many benefits to living in a condo (for instance, I have still never once had to shovel my own snow), and for me – the benefits outweigh the cons. But I had always been cognizant of the fact that those cons existed, and gone out of my way to alleviate any drawbacks as best I could myself. It really would take a neighbor going far and above a reasonable usage of their space before I would complain to them about it.

That said, I could see where this guy (girl? Person? I had no idea who this was) was coming from. I get it. I’m a light sleeper too – hence the white noise machine. Most of the people who know me know that I am not a happy camper if they wake me up before it’s time for me to actually get up. Since Loo moved to Texas, we’ve had to have more than a few discussions about time zones and the fact that it is not acceptable for her to be texting and calling me at 5 am. She finally changed my name in her phone to “Not Before 11am” to remind herself.

I seriously miss that girl!

The point is, I do understand. If you don’t have to be up in the morning, it definitely sucks to have something completely out of your control waking you. I would be annoyed too.

I guess the difference is though; I would have gone out of my way to find a way to resolve the problem myself first. And then if I couldn’t come up with anything, I would have attempted to speak to the person face to face to come up with a compromise that fell somewhere short of asking them to completely stop their otherwise reasonable behavior.

So, that’s what I did. I followed my dad’s advice and walked over to the unit I figured the note must have come from. The light was on and I could hear the television playing in the background. But when I rang the bell, no one answered. So… I tried to knock. And again, no one answered.

Weird.

I went back to my house and contemplated for a while. I got online and started looking at ways to resolve the noise produced by treadmills, and almost immediately found shock absorber pads that could be placed underneath the machine. I grabbed my keys and went to Sports Authority to get one.

When I got back, I went to the neighbor’s home once more. And once more it seemed like someone was there but no one answered.

Weird.

So, I went to my house and wrote them a note of my own:

I’m really hoping that I have the right house in leaving this note! I received a note this evening on my door regarding my use of a treadmill in the mornings, and I want to first start by sincerely apologizing. Not having any downstairs neighbors, it never in a million years occurred to me that someone may hear me working out. The treadmill is actually in the middle of the room, while there are two dressers and a bed against the wall. I am incredibly sorry that it has been waking you up, and I feel awful.

That said, I am hoping there is a happy medium to this situation. Working out in the morning before I have to go to work every day is the only time I can really commit to being able to get a run in, and that’s not something I really want to have to give up in my own home.

Unfortunately, there is no other room I can move the treadmill to. I have a friend living with me, and the two of us have pretty thoroughly filled this space. I tried to think for a moment how I could re-arrange my room to make a difference, but the only thing I can come up with wouldn’t move the treadmill that much further from the wall, and it would wind up putting my television against the wall – which I think in the end would probably be worse.

I went out and purchased a shock absorber pad to put under the treadmill tonight and hope that perhaps that will make a difference in some of what you are hearing. The only reason I’ve never done this in the past is because, like I said, it never occurred to me that anyone would be able to hear or be bothered by these workouts. If that doesn’t help though, I want to offer to buy you a white noise machine to sleep with. I actually had to purchase one when I first bought my home here because the noise from the garage combined with that from my upstairs neighbors is constantly waking me up. I too am a very light sleeper, so I understand. I can say that having one has made a difference for me in terms of adjusting to the noises that come with living in a condo.

Again, I really am hoping that we can find a mutually satisfactory compromise somehow. I don’t want to have to give up working out in my own home, but I don’t want you to have to be sleeping on your couch in yours either. If you don’t notice a difference tomorrow morning, please feel free to call me at some point during the day (my number is XXX-XXXX) and we can discuss solutions further.

Sincerely,

And then I signed it with my name. Trying to take some of the anonymity out of this.

After all – I’m a nice girl! No reason to tip-toe around me when you have a valid complaint. I’m all about compromise!

So yesterday morning, I got up and worked out. Even though Jack had just arrived and for the first time in 4 weeks, I really wanted to stay in bed. I did it, because I wanted to be able to see if it would make any difference at all.

Then all day long, I waited to see if I would hear from them. And I waited. And I waited.

Until my roommate called me at 3:30 to say she had just gotten home, and there was another note on the door.

You’ve got to be effing kidding me.

As she opened it up, she began to read it to me. “Thank you. I didn’t hear anything this morning at all!” she said. Apparently “at all” was underlined.

No signature, no further clue as to who these people were; nothing.

Freaking weirdo’s.

I’m sorry, I just don’t get it. We’re neighbors. Do we really need to be resorting to anonymous notes on doors over something like this?

Again, I am a nice girl! I swear!

Even if I did just call them freaking weirdo’s. But that’s only because… they are freaking weirdo’s!

Either way though, it seems as though the situation is resolved. For now. Hopefully for good.

Because really and truly – I wasn’t giving up my workouts.

I'm not that nice a girl.