I'm Not Sorry

I have to admit it.

I’m not sorry.

I don’t feel bad.

Or guilty.

Or in the wrong.

Not even a little bit.

I know there are a few who think I went too far yesterday. A few who felt a pang of sympathy for poor Jon. And I thought about it. I really did. I called up some friends (moral, good, classy, kind-hearted friends) who are usually pretty fantastic about putting me in my place when I cross a line or two (which to be fair, sometimes happens in my attempt to find humor in each and every situation I encounter). But I was reassured by even them that there was nothing wrong with yesterdays post.

That sometimes – a creeper just needs to be put on blast.

Now, to clear up some fears I know a few of you had – Jon is not some poor, innocent, naïve kid who simply doesn’t know any better. How do I know this? Well his Facebook page paints a pretty clear picture of who Jon is (or at least – who he wishes to portray himself to be).

For instance, according to his page, he “hates sluts” (who doesn’t?) and is a fan of the “Pussy Wagon” (aren’t we all?)

Now, I'm not sure how exactly those two things don't completely contradict each other, but I'll go ahead and let that be.

As far as the languages he speaks (because I know some of you were worried that he is not a Native English speaker, and that perhaps that could account for his lack of brain power), he proudly proclaims that he “Knows street talk, slang" and that he speaks "fluent fuck off”.

Good to know.

A little further digging makes it pretty clear that he is definitely an English speaker, and that he has been in the United States for quite a long time (I’m assuming for his entire life – but obviously I didn’t dig that far back). A poor grasp on the English language was not the problem though, because it would appear that it is his native tongue. It’s just questionable how far he made it during the part of school that actually involved learning how to use that native tongue.

The truth is, I think Jon is a douche. And even more – I think Jon knows he’s a douche. And is maybe even a little proud of that fact. Which is why I don’t feel even kind of bad for putting him on blast.

In fact, I actually felt far worse for poking fun at Guenther way back when. Because there was part of me that wondered then (part of me that still wonders) whether or not there was possibly some underlying disability with Guenther that perhaps I shouldn’t be exploiting.

I’m not worried about that with Jon though. Lisa hit the nail on the head with her comment about him – he’s a scum bag hoping to capitalize upon what he perceives to be the vulnerability of an infertile woman. Hoping to play that situation somehow to his advantage.

Probably because he's not getting as far as he would like with the "sluts" he proclaims to hate.

He's looking for an easier target.

And if I were going to make a guess – I would bet that I was not the only person he sent that e-mail to.

For whatever it’s worth – Jon’s e-mail didn’t make me angry. Not even a little bit. Sure, it left me just the slightest bit annoyed (mostly over the fact that there are people so stupid and insensitive in this world at all), but for the most part – it made me laugh. Which is why I shared it – to make all of you laugh as well. Because, it’s ridiculous. This guy is ridiculous. Other guys like him are ridiculous. So, I’m not sorry for making fun of him. And as soon as I finished doing so – I jumped into the shower and then happily took off to spend my Friday night with the boy. Not an ounce of anger inside of me at all.

Also, I just want to point out that I’ve gotten probably 5 similar e-mails between Guenther and Jon. I haven’t shared any of them. Mostly because there was something about each of those e-mails that just seemed off. Sad maybe. Peculiar. Something that I just didn’t feel right poking fun at though. So I didn’t.

I’m not completely heartless after all.

But with Jon? His douche-factor was strikingly evident. And it was just too skuzzy not to share.

The Jon's of the world don't deserve any more respect than they are willing to give out themselves. And there is absolutely nothing respectful about trying to prey upon a woman's broken heart in the hopes of getting something out of it yourself.

As far as those concerned about the sharing of his e-mail address – let’s remember that Jon was asking me for help in finding his perfect infertile mate. I’m just giving him that help he requested. Because I'm helpful like that! Who knows; maybe some girl will actually wind up feeling sorry for him and will reach out. Maybe he’ll actually wind up getting exactly what he wants.

I hope not, mostly because I would hate to see any of you fall prey to such scum, but maybe… After all, there’s someone for everyone. Right?

Either way though, it’s not like e-mail addresses are some big, secret, private, locked-down entity. If they were, I wouldn’t have 40 spam messages in my e-mail at this very moment. Your e-mail is left behind in a variety of things you do online. It’s rarely all that difficult to track down or find. We’re not talking about a physical address, or a social security number, or anything else of that magnitude. We’re talking about an e-mail address. Where messages are sent that are fully capable of being simply deleted without reading. And perhaps if Jon was so concerned about the security of his e-mail address, he shouldn’t have used it to send me such ridiculousness to begin with.

Because at the end of the day, if Jon is cringing over this – good. Maybe it will teach him a lesson. Maybe he’ll realize that there is nothing even the least bit cool about sending a message like that to someone you know nothing about. Maybe it will dawn on him that there are various avenues to dating that are far more appropriate than reaching out in the way he did.

Maybe it’s just the kick in the butt that Jon needs.

Regardless – I’m not sorry.

Maybe I should be.

Maybe (like Karrie suggested) I now have one more thing to ask for forgiveness for in church tomorrow (actually Karrie – you’re probably right about that!)

But still – I’m not sorry.

I’m willing to open it up to a vote though. I just started a discussion over at the community – Was It Really So Wrong?

What do you think? Should I be ashamed of myself? Should I feel pity for Jon? Did he deserve better? Was posting his e-mail address going too far?

Or… Is there something to be said for finding the humor in something like this? Something to be said for putting a douche on blast?

Should I take e-mails like this in silence?

Or do they deserve to be shared with the world?

What do you think?

Let us know over at the community.

In the meantime though - I'm not sorry.

(UPDATE: I was actually asked on 6/13 by BlogHer to take the original post down. They said I could repost it on my review blog (where their ads don't appear) if I wanted, but they couldn't have it associated with their ad content. Which I TOTALLY get (and is actually the only thing I DO feel bad about - I hadn't considered the fact that I wasn't just representing myself when I wrote that post). I've always liked working with BlogHer, and they were wonderful in their e-mail to me, so I have no issues at all with removing it at this point. I won't be reposting it on the review blog either. I don't really see the point of that. The purpose was served, you know?


So, the post is coming down now. Lucky for Dear Jon!)