Around noon it seemed like the spotting may have stopped. If it had, I think I maybe could have been more hopeful that it was just really late implantation bleeding.
It started up again about an hour ago though, and now it’s bright red. It’s still very little, but it’s there every time I wipe.
I just don’t see how that could possibly be OK.
My Tuesday blood test is being moved to tomorrow. The woman I spoke to this morning was very sweet, but she didn’t sound very hopeful herself. She said that it is possible that the Prometrium capsules could be causing me to spot; that those can sometimes irritate your cervix. She told me to try not to lose hope, but that there really wasn’t much I could do about it if it was over. She just told me to drink a lot of water, stay in bed, and try to stay calm.
I’ve been lying in bed watching movie after movie on Netflix instant play; ignoring anything and everything I had originally had planned for today. I’m fine as long as I don’t talk to anyone. As soon as I answer my phone though, I start sobbing.
Every. Single. Time.
I’ve just stopped answering. I can’t handle hearing people’s concern. I had one friend offer to bring me ice cream under the promise that ice cream can work wonders. I told her that unless ice cream could make me pregnant, I didn’t want any.
What kind of a person says such mean things to someone who is only trying to be there for them?
I just obviously can’t really deal with people today, and I’m not exactly looking forward to the next very busy week at work.
I'm trying to trust in God. Trying to believe that there is a plan bigger than my own. Trying to remember to give it to Him.
I’m just not sure how I’m supposed to feel about this. How I’m supposed to react.
What I’m supposed to do now?
ADSPACE
