I was living in San Diego and pretty much loving my life. I had amazing roommates, a good job, and I lived just a few blocks from the beach.
It was a good life.
But I was also living in the middle of a party town and it was starting to get old… fast. If you are ever looking for a good time, Pacific Beach California is the place to be. Garnet Avenue is packed with bars and there is something going on every night of the week. Between my job working at one of the busiest of those bars, and my life outside of work; I spent almost every night in a drinking establishment.
That was the norm there. My friends and roommates were all the exact same way. It was rare for us to spend nights in and we were all always pretty much up for a good time.
Plus, dating in San Diego was a blast because you were always meeting new people. A lack of guys to hang out with was a pretty odd occurrence.
But around the point I turned 25, I started to realize that this was not what I wanted from my life. I started to really think about settling down. About having a real relationship and eventually having kids.
And neither of those things seemed like they were going to happen in San Diego. Have you ever heard the theory that you should surround yourself with people who have the things you want? Well, I tend to believe in that theory to an extent, and none of my friends in San Diego had what I wanted. None of them even wanted what I wanted. Most of them were pretty content to keep living young and free for as long as possible.
I was working in a bar and I knew I would never be able to leave the money I was making there either. It was too easy, but that lifestyle wasn’t what I wanted anymore. The sad thing was that I knew that I would never get a “real job” in San Diego that would pay what my bar job did, so how would I ever leave it as long as the promise of that kind of money and flexibility was there?
I knew I needed a change. My best friend from college was from Alaska, and I had started visiting her in Anchorage when her son was born. I loved the town. She and I had actually moved to San Diego together, and when she left after less than a year because she was missing home; I thought she was nuts. It was funny though, because as soon as I started to visit I discovered how much I loved it. I had never seen such beautiful scenery. Sure, I loved my beach; but this was different. On top of that, I really fell in love with her son; with this settled down life she was living. I wanted to be here to watch him grow up and I was ready for my life to change too.
So I made the decision to move.
Most of my San Diego friends thought I had lost my mind. We really did have a good life there. The sun was always out and we had managed to snag condos all right next door to each other. It was rare that any of us ever fought or argued (in fact, it almost never happened). We were like a bunch of sorority sister’s just loving life and supporting each other. I’m not sure there will ever be a point in my life again where I will be surrounded so closely by such a large group of amazing women.
But I knew it couldn’t last forever. I knew that we would all eventually grow up and move on. I knew there would be husbands and children and that we wouldn’t always be our little tight-knit group spending every night together.
It just so happened that I was the first one who found herself ready for more.
I sold everything I owned. At one point I had been able to furnish an entire apartment, but I got rid of it all (including my bed) on Craigslist. I knew that shipping would be ridiculous, and I reasoned that I would buy whatever I needed once I got to Alaska. It was actually kind of freeing. By the time I left, all of my belongings fit into one (very large) duffle bag. There was something about that that just felt right. I loved the idea of completely starting over.
Of course, I hadn't considered the fact that everything in Alaska costs more... Were I ever to make that move again, I would definitely have shipped all my belongings! Buying new up here almost killed me.
Against my father’s pleas, I further made the decision that I wanted to drive. It was actually going to be a little more expensive to do so (this was when gas prices were at their highest), but I just knew it would be an incredible adventure. A good friend of mine signed on to do the trip with me, and we started planning. We were going to take our time and see everything. It was going to be life changing.
Unfortunately, about a week before I was originally supposed to leave; my best friend’s mom got very ill. She wasn’t expected to survive, and my heart was aching for my friend. I just wanted to be there for her; no matter what happened.
My traveling partner wasn’t able to get the time off work early, and I knew I had to go. So I set off on my own a week early, with the plans of getting there as quickly as humanly possible.
My poor father about had a heart attack.
That first day I drove for 34 hours straight. I made it all the way from San Diego to Canada in one shot.
I was living off of those 5 hour energy drinks. Sucking them down every two hours or so.
I also didn’t stop for food once. Instead, I had picked up green apples, fiber one bars, trail mix, and a case of water before leaving.
You can imagine how good I was feeling after just 2 days.
But I powered through. I tried to stop in Calgary to sleep, but all the hotels I stopped at were booked. I drove another 50 miles and got my first hotel in a smaller town. I slept about 10 hours, and then I took off again.
Throughout the drive, Montana was probably my favorite spot. It was beautiful. Rolling hills, water, and everything green. I could definitely see myself living there one day.
Canada meanwhile didn’t impress me much until I started to get further up north. Once I started driving again, I did another 32 hour stretch until I wound up in White horse.
The Alcan was an interesting drive. It was beautiful, but also a little sketchy. My last two days of traveling I had zero cell phone reception. That actually really scared me. I was exhausted (and possibly delirious), in a foreign country (kind of), and I wasn’t able to communicate with anyone. I would drive for hours without seeing a single other person.
I realized at one point that something could happen to me, and no one who loved me would ever find me.
I could end up in my very own version of The Hills Have Eyes, and that would be it.
Suddenly my plan to drive alone seemed idiotic. As the exhaustion crept up on me I started to think I should stop to sleep, but for over 900 miles all I ever saw were these extremely small towns. I attempted to stop one night, but the only motel I found had a sign at the front that said “Go into a room and close the door. Pay in the morning.” There were no locks on the doors.
That wasn’t about to happen.
So I powered through and just kept driving.
Luckily it was just before Summer Solstice, so the higher up I got the more sunlight I had. That last “night” of driving the sun really only went down for about 3 hours.
And the things I saw were unbelievable. Bison hanging out on the side of the road.
Bear roadblocks.
Scenery that would take your breath away.
It wasn’t all beautiful.
But it was definitely an adventure.
When I came into Canada they barely looked at my driver’s license and didn’t ask for my passport. The Alaskan border was another story though.
They asked if I was carrying a weapon, and when I told them "no" they asked me to get out of the car. They didn’t believe me. They didn’t believe that a young woman would drive the Alcan by herself without a gun. They thought I was lying.
So there I was: a blond girl in San Diego State University sweats, driving a Honda CRV with California plates, a valid passport and a California ID being held at the U.S. border in Alaska.
It would have been comical if I hadn’t been so tired.
Eventually they let me pass though, and then it was only about 10 more hours of driving until I was finally “home”. Seeing the girl who had been my best friend for years and her little boy waving at the window let me know that everything had just changed; that I was about to start the next chapter of my life.
I made the entire trip in 4 days. I was exhausted and delirious and passed out almost as soon as I walked into the house. It took me almost a week before I felt “normal” again. I assumed that was how long it took for the hundred energy shots I drank to work their way out of my system!
We went out one of my first nights in town to celebrate my arrival, and at the bar I took this picture:
It made me laugh, because it signified everything I thought I had left behind.
I started over though. I got a great 9-5 job and bought a home. I dated and fell in love with a man. I explored Alaska and I made new friends.
I was also diagnosed with endometriosis and told it was time to consider my options when it came to having children.
It’s funny how life works out, because in San Diego I had no health insurance. I was living a pretty chaotic lifestyle and loved my roommates and my college ways. I’m not sure I would have even been able to seek help had my issues started there; I know I couldn't have afforded treating my endo without coverage. I also know I never would have been in a position to make the decisions I’m making now. My life was just so different.
(community discussion: What is the biggest move you've ever made?)
I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe that my change of heart and desire for something new were all necessary to get me to the point I needed to be today.
I believe that God was getting me prepared for what was about to come.
I believe that everything fell into place, so that I could face this now.
