It was Jason Mesnicks Season. I thought he was adorable on Deanna’s season, and when Ty came into play I really fell in love (yes, I fall in love with children faster than I fall in love with men. If this really surprises you about me, you haven't been paying attention!)
I didn’t apply thinking that Jason and I were actually going to live happily ever after (and after seeing how his season turned out – I would have beat that guy down), but I thought it would be a cool experience. The travel, making new friends, and the man – I figured it was definitely something I could have fun with.
(community discussion going on right now: Reality TV - Have you ever? Would you ever?)
I made it through the first few rounds, and then was rejected towards the end. The most amusing thing about that rejection was that they sent an e-mail out that basically said “Just because you didn’t make it on to The Bachelor doesn’t mean you can’t find love elsewhere. There is someone out there for you.” I thought it was hysterical. I basically got a Dear John letter from a TV station. Are there girls who really take that whole thing so seriously that they would think they are not worthy of love if they didn’t make it?
I was just bummed I wasn’t going to get some exotic vacation!
And I was also a little bummed I wasn’t going to get to meet Ty.
I still have my audition tape, and call me crazy; I thought it was something some of you might get a kick out of. I cut the beginning out because it gave my identifying information (and I am not out to encourage stalkers right now!) but otherwise it is all there. This was almost exactly 2 years ago. It was right before I moved to Alaska, and about 6 months before my health problems started. Watching it now I’m almost blown away at how I talk about my readiness to settle down and have kids; that really is the most ironic part of this whole thing. I moved to Alaska (and left behind my San Diego, single, party girl ways) because I was ready to meet someone and have children. Then shortly after getting here I found out that dream may never become a reality.
I will give a few warnings: 1) I have no idea what I was thinking with that dress. They told us not to wear black, and it was my only non-black dress (and I was not about to spend money on a dress for my Bachelor audition tape!) but… WOW boobs! 2) I am nervous. I am so nervous. I can see it in my hands, and in how bouncy I am… I am not generally that bouncy, I swear! 3) I am totally that animated in real life if it is just me and a few close friends, but in big groups – I’m like a different person. I really am a wallflower in large groups; I get so uncomfortable. Probably a good thing I didn’t make the show – What if I had turned out to be the crazy girl who cries the first night?!? 4) The camera work is shotty at best. My roommate at the time (one of the most amazing women I know) stood on a chair (because we decided taping from an angle made my face look thinner – seriously!) and used my cannon point and shoot camera to tape the entire thing as another of our close friends asked me the questions. We were high tech!
And Dad and Grandma: That part about me deep throating bananas? Totally false. Not even kind of true. I made it up for effect and I have never done that in my life.
(Beloved Readers: I just lied.)
OK, no more disclaimers! Say hello to 25 year old S.I.F. on her quest to date The Bachelor (and see the world on someone else’s dime):
Untitled from S.I.F. on Vimeo.
If you just made it through that whole thing, congratulations! Now here is the part where I tell you I wouldn’t go on The Bachelor now if you paid me. The guys keep getting cheesier and cheesier, and the girls keep getting more and more fake. No thank you.
But, The Amazing Race? I would so be there!
Maybe even Big Brother, although I can’t even really tell you why except that I think I could kill at some of those challenges (the ones that don’t require strength or coordination!)
I’m actually thinking I should have my own reality show now though – not because I think I’m all that interesting, but because if Trista can find Ryan on reality TV (yes, I do adore that sexy fireman!), than surely I can find my baby daddy! We could actually call it “Are You My Baby Daddy”. Bring on 25 successful bachelors, and let me grill them, drill them, and sperm test them to oblivion until one of them finally rises above the pack. Then, that one gets the privilege of making a happy, sparkly, perfect baby with me.
You know you would watch it!
