Let me just preface this all by saying that I have been a bit of a train wreck today. The new shot has definitely kicked in, because I have been crying all day without rhyme or reason. It was just one of those days when you are in a funk, and you have absolutely no idea why. Thankfully, I was pretty alone in my office all day (and free to have break downs without judgment) but seriously? I am about to kick this downer mood in the butt if it kills me!
I did have my consult today with the “tour guide” – the lady whose job it is to teach me about sperm and the joys of sperm buying. It was pretty enlightening. I now have the names and sites of 6 (that’s right ladies and gentlemen – 6!) sperm banks to start sifting through. When she noticed on my file that my cycle date isn’t until November though, she stared to laugh at me. Apparently people don’t typically start doing these things so early, but I explained to her that I am kind of anal like that. Procrastination is not my thing! She said it was perfect though, because sometimes the good sperm sells out (who knew?) and this way I'll have plenty of time to really get the lay of the land and hop right on my sperm when I find it!
Kind of like the early bird get’s the sperm!
That’s right; I have resorted to telling lame jokes in an effort to kick my Lupron induced funk.
She did give me a few things to consider before I go out into the world of sperm buying; namely CMV status and blood type. Apparently, even though random people hook up and make babies all the time with no concern at all for these factors, ladies who pay for their sperm should really take it all into consideration. Again, who knew?
I have no idea what my CMV status is (apparently it is a fairly common virus, like strep or HPV or Herpes – she made it sound like it’s no big deal, but I’m never a fan of finding out I have things that could be in the same category as Herpes. Call me crazy.) If you are negative CMV, the FDA says you shouldn’t buy sperm that is positive - but if you are positive, you can buy whatever dirty sperm you want! Since my blood testing won’t even be done until September-ish (and doctors don't typically test for CMV since it has no real symptoms), she said I should just shoot for donors who are negative to be safe. Works for me! Gerard Butler is totally a donor who is probably negative for CMV, right? I’ll take some of whatever he’s got available please.
I also need to consider blood type, because if my blood type is RH- (don’t even know what that means!) I should choose a donor who is also RH- (again, can you imagine having this conversation with your husband to be: “I need to know if you are RH- babe, because if you aren’t I’m just not sure we should make babies together.” Ha! They said it is because your body is more likely to attack an RH+ baby if you are RH- though, so I get it, it’s just… so weird to be considering these things!) Here's the kicker though: I don’t know my blood type.
I didn’t really think this was a big deal. I kind of thought this was something that would be written down somewhere and I could easily access it. WRONG. My family/childhood doctor doesn’t have it, my OBGYN doesn’t have it, the agency I donated to doesn’t have it, and the hospital I had my surgeries at last year doesn’t have it. That’s the part that threw me the most. Wouldn’t you think that would kind of be something they would want on file? You know, in case I bled out?
Tomorrow I am going to try the clinic I donated my eggs through, but if they don’t have it I'm going to have to go to the doctor for blood typing. I’m just amazed that out of all the blood I have had drawn in the last year, no one has taken note of my blood type. Kind of crazy.
So, sperm shopping will begin as soon as I know my blood type. I’m thinking it is going to involve a spreadsheet of some kind. I’m OCD like that.
They did give me something else to consider: Apparently three of the six banks have donors that have agreed to be contacted by the children their sperm helps create when those children are 18. They have no right to contact the child themselves, but they agree to keep their information updated and on file so that if a child chooses to do so, they can contact their “bio dad”. I know I signed similar forms when I donated my eggs, but the whole sperm donor process seems so different from the egg donor process (you can’t even see pictures of these guys! When I donated my eggs, they paid for an entire photo shoot for me so that the parents could see nice photos of me, rather than the ones I sent where I was always with friends and typically in a bar – oops!) I guess I was just surprised to see that was even an option with sperm donors, and that any of the sperm donors would actually agree to it. That sperm costs more, but I think I’m going to try and get it. I like the idea of my child having the option of making that decision when they are an adult, and being able to decide what it is they want rather than what I think they should want.
OK, are you ready for the stupid move story of the week/month/year? I got a call from one of my doctors today, and they were concerned because my insurance had not yet paid for an appointment in December of last year. They called my insurance company and were told that the insurance had sent the check to me. I vehemently denied this (my insurance has never sent me a check before, why would they have done it on just that one bill – that just doesn’t make sense) and further, I stated that I had seen the insurance statement in question and that I knew exactly where it was and would be able to sort this all out tomorrow. I assured them that the insurance company had made a mistake, and I would fix it. I was adamant that I had never received a check though. If I had, I would have paid the bill - I am not a girl who lets bills slide!
I got home, and went straight to my medical file (which is starting to strain under the pressure of too many documents!) I went to the section where I knew my insurance statements were, and almost immediately found the statement I was looking for – with a check for almost $400 in my name attached to the bottom. I hadn’t even looked at it, just filed it away with the rest of my statements. Crap. Now I am going to have to explain to that woman tomorrow what a blond I really am!
But seriously? Why would my insurance send me a check like that, on just that one bill? They have never done that before, why do it now?
At least, I don’t think they’ve ever done it before.
I’ll be in my medical file for the rest of the night if you need me.
ADSPACE
